Some Random Thoughts on Award Shows in General

John J

I don't pretend to be "in the know" on pop culture. The extent of my knowledge on popular television consists of "The Voice looks stupid and I refuse to watch it". So I thought I'd show that I'm a 75 year old man in a 26 year old body by critiquing current television, and I'm going to use the CMT Music Awards as my pincushion. I'd apologize to country fans, but I kinda think that the role of "apology recipient" belongs to me on that one.

I visited USA Today's website this morning (which I usually do when I'm in an overly-positive mood and I need to dial it down a bit closer to "emotionally defeated") and saw an article on the CMT Music Awards.

Not "Country Music Awards". CMT Music Awards. Country Music Television Music Awards. So, pop-country that airs on your network. So, like 16 bands/performers.

Kid Rock is hosting tonight. Yes, no other country music star oozes as much natural charisma and mainstream showmanship like a long-haired swamp-creature in a fedora.

I've never understood the need for more than, say, two award ceremonies for media. The Oscars and the Emmy's, although still completely self-congratulatory and grossly insulting to people who don't have any money or prospects, at least are holding a death-grip onto what little glamorous Hollywood sparkle from the 50's is left. But let's take a look at some of the less fantastic;

S.A.G.
American Music Awards
Daytime Emmy
Tony Awards
Country Music Award (CMA)
People's Choice Awards
Golden Globe
MTV Music Awards
MTV Movie Awards
Billboard Music Awards
Grammy Awards
Kid's Choice Awards
Teen Choice Awards
Soul Train Music Awards
Essence Awards
Spike TV Scream Awards
Comedy Central Comedy Awards
CMT Music Awards
TV Land Awards

These are just ones that I thought of while writing this. Nothing says "I matter in the industry" like being nominated for the American Music Awards and CMT Music Awards but not the CMA's or Billboard Music Awards, and winning only the CMT Music Award... for best single of the year. YES! One out of four award shows gave online voters the choice of 6 songs and people voted that my one song that my label forced on Clearchannel radio was the most popular of the month! Vindication!

Maybe I'm just griping for no real reason. Maybe these award shows are just a way for the viewing public to see their favorite singers/actors in settings outside of magazines and music videos. Maybe it's just a chance to celebrate the growth of the industry and the wide breadth of its talent.

Or maybe it's just a way for stupid people to suck at the oily tit of manufactured fame until they get fired from Target and die on their couch.

Hooray for award shows!